diatuooc | Test Drive Reloaded! #1

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Test Drive Reloaded! #1

Test Drive #1

Welcome to Diatu (I Like Swords)

The Arrival Hall is all aflurry with activity! No one had expected so many Sundered to suddenly pop up, the staff find themselves desperately scrambling to keep up with the influx, and a bunch of new arrivals find themselves hanging out in the Hall lobby, waiting to be seen, sent home if possible, or counseled and prepared for student life if not. Rumors run like wildfire: some people believe they've been kidnapped by aliens, a worryingly persistent suggestion that this is a setup for a murder-tournament keeps circulating, and one or two nutcases insist that a dragon tinkered with the rules of magic and now they have to study at a magic school to survive. Pie stocks are grievously low, and thought Headmaster Birony herself appeared and began violating the rules of space and time to summon pies from the future, a second Headmaster Birony with an eyepatch, several war scars, and a wild hairdo appeared and promptly yelled at the first Headmaster for stealing her pies. A pie fight erupted. Pie stocks are even more grievously low now.

Still, here's your chance to talk to your fellow arrivals. Or aggressively attack the nearest target in an outrage (they set up a target dummy and labeled it VENT AGGRESSION HERE, and are trusting you guys on the honor system). Staff don't have time to talk, but they promise they'll get to you soon!

A Day In The Life

The sun is bright, the air is warm, a cool breeze blows across Anastara, clouds keep drifting directly through the island and engulfing people... it's summer on Ascelion, and the day is ripe for learning. Or as ripe as Diatu Magicademy ever can be -- though no one would trade the character and charm of the lively campus for some stodgy, regimented school more interested in forcing students into the mold than encouraging them to be their best, sometimes conditions in the Magicademy are a little inconvenient.

A toilet in Kedrigan Hall keeps clamping onto the butts of those who attempt to use it. Thus far, half a dozen students have been freed from its clutches by their friends, while reports of singed buttocks have increased twofold. (Yes, only twofold. Think about that for a minute.) Staff are on the lookout for a prankster rather than a commode, so as of yet the treacherous toilet has gone unpunished...

Not far away, a group of cleaning golems has occupied the promenade as part of an ongoing strike. As they possess only rudimentary intelligence, they believe this involves seizing objects from anyone who passes nearby and hurling them at a set of bowling pins. Meliandre Tomekin, Head of Groundskeeping, has set up shop across the Promenade; any student who wanders too close gets a big block of ice shoved into their hands, along with instructions to hold it still while she shows those reprobates what-for...

In the Great Hall proper, school clubs and activities have, as was inevitable, escalated competition for new students to yet another level which only isn't a war crime because it isn't part of a treaty yet: they've conscripted geese. Horrible geese, to be precise, who dispense flyers for various clubs with less subtlety than a nuclear holocaust. Some of them fight for dominance, others have teamed up to pin down innocent students and stuff leaflets down their throat, and one has a wand and is somehow casting Discovery spells?!

A Forgery!

"I tried a mass-Forging technique," the older student says, showing off the briefcase full of identical wands and a sign that says 'FOR $ALE CHEAP'. "Some of them are exactly what I intended, they self-correct runes, but the rest, well.. . I don't know, I can't tell, and I'm not really interested in finding out one by one, so... you buying?"

All sales final. No refunds. Caveat emptor. As for what the wands do, well... there's a reason he answered with an ellipsis when asked. On the other hand, maybe the effect isn't too terrible? Maybe it's even beneficial! Maybe the wand shoots out rainbows and muffins! Or maybe it just animates and strikes you vigorously about the head and shoulders...

Three Dragon War

Someone, we're not naming names, canons, or the color of eyes and the dragon to which they belong that forms said person's obsession, may or may not be indirectly responsible for the latest game craze sweeping Anastara: Three Dragon War, a collectible card game that features players as dragons, deploying spells, creatures, and Sundered against each other to destroy each and avoid the machinations of the Third Dragon. The awesome thing about the game is that the Third Dragon comes in all different forms: classic bundled-with-the-starter-pack Ire, super-rare Anastara Diatu, suspiciously-rare Cam Birony, ultra-common Large Eagull, and more. The concept of an outside force adding randomness to the battle and being manipulated in turn by cards means Three Dragon War is the hottest card game that's come along since the last card game that was the hottest that had come along came along.

Face-to-face, you find yourself in a duel over these cards and the magical images they summon. Can this untested deck come through if you believe in it? Or are statistics and probability actual things that actually happen? Dragon Battle! Jiao Long Fu!

There's One in Every Test Drive

Not every magical disaster is caused by some wayward student you don't know. Many of them are caused by you instead. To wit: you're on the spot in one of the magical labs, being called on to demonstrate a technique more advanced than others you've mastered so far. Failure is expected, and the wards should prevent any injury to others from a miscast spell. But will the sparks of your magic just sputter out and die? Or will you inadvertently mispronounce, misform, misshape, or miscalculate in a way that brings chaos to you and your lab partner?

(You could also manage to succeed in casting the spell, but that isn't very fun.)

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He made a few mmms of agreement and resolved to tell him the world was already saved by Adam over their meal. Crowley deserved to know that despite everything, all their mishaps and quarrels, it worked out in the end.

The rambling into their silences was what made Crowley Crowley, and Aziraphale wouldn't have it any other way. He was as much an encourager and contributor to the off-tangent conversations they had pursued over the years, and couldn't very well begrudge Crowley a little rambling to fill the awkward spaces between them. It was always just nice to listen to that familiar, comfortable voice.

The question took him by surprise and the happy glow faded into charmed blush. He had been human, once, in his world-hopping travels, and there was no escaping the knowledge that carrying another's books was somewhat of a school-sweethearts tradition, and it was very in line with Crowley's nature, like holding a door, or carrying his shopping, or miracling a puddle away so he didn't have to step in it. He looked down the path, unable to hide his smile.

"If you like. I wouldn't say no."

Is that what that meant? If he had been called out on it Crowley would have feigned innocence, saying the gesture was only something he had seen kids doing in those old timely school days movies that he had liked to watch so much when drive-ins were that rare novelty that never really caught on in the UK. There was something satisfying about being able to sit in your car and watch a movie on the big screen. Shame really, that they hadn't lasted. Aziraphale might have enjoyed a movie as long as they were seated side-by-side in his Bentley.

This was a test. Aziraphale trusted him! Crowley knew that, but there had been that brief period of time which was so fresh in his mind when there had been a doubt. Back then the Angel might have said no, I won't tell you where Adam is and I won't even let you touch my books. Now however he would be trusted with them. Books meant a lot to Aziraphale and it said a great deal that he would be allowed to carry them. Crowley wondered just how far this newfound freedom extended.

"We could pass notes during lessons, make fun of the teachers," What other sort of things did delinquent kids do? Ah! "Cut class under the bleachers?"

"The professors are good people. We will not make fun of them in our notes," he said, turning up his nose in the usual prim way he did when disagreeing with Crowley's troublemaking. "We'll have plenty of other things to discuss, I'm sure. We always do."

Under the bleachers, hm? In his youth, as a human, boys would cut class to do such things like smoke or drink, but he and Crowley could simply do that in their off hours. They also cut classes to do...things together in secluded areas, as young men had to during that era. Overall, cutting classes wasn't all that different from what he and Crowley had done for centuries--perpetually caught up in socializing with each other during what should have been worktime. He didn't actually have any objections.

"I'm not sure there are any bleachers to cut class under." He glanced sidelong at Crowley. "We may have to get creative."

"Like being a 'good person' has ever saved anyone from being written about in notes!"

In fact that often made people the target of such notes if they were too annoying or made themselves into a 'goody two-shoes'. Did kids still use that phrase? Nah, probably not! A wuss then. Or the type that was such a know-it-all that they ended up being shoved into lockers and given swirlies in the bathroom.

Which actually... He could see quite easily happen to Aziraphale. He was just the sort to end up in a locker.

"Creative. Yeah, like popping out of homeroom for a pint. Bit silly really... an angel and a demon heading to school. What do we really need to learn here?"

A beat.

"Other than your locker combination? Better share that with me as backup."

In a normal campus, Aziraphale probably would be the target of bullies. Had Heaven had lockers or a dumpster to toss him into, those bad angels might have done something rather mean there. However, he wasn't thinking of nerds in lockers, or following Crowley's train of thought in regards to threats on his lunch money or some such.

They stood to learn a lot, but first--

"I'm not even sure we have lockers here. At least, I've never bothered to use ones. Adults don't live in the dorms, so it made more sense to store all my supplies and library materials in my room, since I was the only one using it."

He tried for subtlety. "I could give you a key to my room, however, if you're that concerned about me being locked out of my storage spaces."

Full stop! Full brake squealing, impending car crash, smoke billowing from the tires, stop! The key to his room?

THE.
KEY.
TO.
HIS.
ROOM!?

First the forgiveness thing and then this!? If the Heavens had opened up and God herself had spoken Crowley couldn't have been any more surprised. But... its not like he hadn't thought about it, them cohabitating in the same space. He had that big open flat that could be cluttered with a few hundred books without losing too much floor space. It simply had never come up. When could a demon ask an angel to share space without it seeming... well, too fast?

Crowley sniffed, his head bobbing slightly to the right as he glanced casually aside and tried to play this cool.

"Sure. I mean... I wouldn't want you getting locked away from your library materials."

Did that sound casual? He peeked at Aziraphale's face to check but only for a moment so as to not give too much away.

"Makes sense to keep the adults and kids separate anyway. They probably have curfews and homework and such."

His coolness levels certainly had Aziraphale convinced. Then again, he thought Crowley was the height of modernity and popular style even when he was inarguably at his absolute oddest, most childish or nerdy. The demon was multifaceted creature. But he also didn't have the angel fooled one bit that he was handling the offer without being affected.

"Yes, exactly. I'd hate to incur a late fee."

He bit back a fond, adoring smile, but it fought its way forward anyway, and he kept his eyes on the path rather than look at Crowley and give away everything.

"We'll have homework too, you know. Lots to study for in school, tests and the like." He couldn't help himself: "We could study together."

"Are the Librarians here super fierce?"

It really didn't matter that Aziraphale wasn't looking at him. Whenever he smiled as happily as that everything he said held that same thrilled-to-bits joy to it. With a glow about his face and a pleased little bounce in his step... Why the angel practically glittered!

It was such a far cry from the last time Crowley had seen him and endlessly puzzling! And the hits just kept coming as the angel figuratively sucker punched him again with that, 'We could study together'. This was not entirely the same as Crowley's suggestion that they run off together but from an angel, one so set upon books and reading, it was just as powerful.

Only those little reminders about all the homework and tests he was going to be expected to do managed to keep his demonic feet on firmly on the ground.

"Nnnnk! They won't make us do tests, will they?? That's just for the kids!"

"Oh, they're nothing like the one in that Camelot-world. She was actually fightening."

And then he remembered Crowley didn't remember that little adventure in puzzle-solving with him and with Alec, and he hoped Alec was alright, wherever in the universe he had ended up. Perhaps with Ellie or that young woman with the pdf, or his daughter, or at least someone was there with him to look after him. He needed looking after. He deserved to be looked after a little, and not just because he looked after everyone else.

"Of course we'll do tests!" he laughed at Crowley's obvious annoyance, glad to be pulled from his own thoughts. "We're students, Crowley. Students take tests. And get grades. I'm sure the young men at Oxford and Cambridge and all those sorts of places take tests too. It'll be fun. ...Unless...are you afraid your magic won't be up to snuff?"

He had been to Camelot in ye olden King Arthur times but he hadn't been one to hang around at the library. Crowley had been out there in the field fermenting... things... in the damp English fog. He had no reason to doubt Aziraphale's words that the librarian back in those times had indeed been fierce. She or he might even have been of the round table for all he knew.

"Of course my magic is up to snuff!"

Affronted by the idea that it would not have been, and for the moment blissfully unaware that he had been gifted a new set of unfamiliar skills, he could be as boastful as he liked.

"I'm obviously going to be top of the class. I doubt anyone else here has been using magic as much as you or I."

He made a noise of agreement along with Crowley's claims of magic up to snuff, like one humoring their spouse in a long disputed and defended contention. Learning magic from the ground up, sort of the human way, was a very humbling experience. Crowley would find out soon enough.

"Perhaps." They were approaching the restaurant now, and Aziraphale stood aside at the door to let Crowley enter first. It seemed appropriate, after all, as Aziraphale had done the asking out this time. "To which house do you belong?"

Just as he had always done he stepped through the doors much like a lady at a ball, but he paused right beyond the entry to wait for Aziraphale to catch him back up... taking the time to point out the best looking table to the maitre d', or whatever passed for one here, so they could stake out their dining location.

"House? They give us a free house?"

Crowley you see had been rather used to getting his orders transmitted directly into his mind and hadn't really bothered to actually listen to much the teaching staff had said about such matters. It had all seemed pretty trivial in the wake of the end of the world and his best friend had broken up with him anyway.

He was so caught up in watching Crowley, he took a half-second longer to catch up.

"Well, you get room and board, yes, but I mean the school of magic you've been assigned to study. I'm in House Ka, and I was hoping we might be in the same classes--you know, so that I might see your magical prowess first hand."

They were given a table out of way, perfect for two people who wanted to be alone together, but still afforded an excellent view of the restaurant and whatever sort of ambiance it had. He place Crème and his school supplies on a spare chair, then when the waiter came, he ordered them both drinks, and himself a slice of overpriced pie, and then waited to let Crowley look at the menu and decide if he wanted anything else before sending their waiter away.

"Ka's focus is Sundering, which is the type of magic that brought us here."

Aziraphale was given a hard stare over the rim of the empty water glass that always seemed to adorn every table at a restaurant but were rarely ever used by those ordering a good mead. That was sarcasm, angel, he was onto you.

"Some one said something about magic when I arrived... I didn't really pay much attention to it. We already have magic."

"We had magic. On my first visit here, I only had the native magic powers. This time, I am fairly certain I could tap into my miracles, but I'm not sure how effective they may be."

He didn't even bother with the water glass or napkin to conceal his sly, self-satisfied smile.

"Dreadfully sorry, dear boy, but you might just have to attend class."

His sneer turned a touch dour. Actually having to go to class and learn magic sounded so... so... well, boring really. The mead could not slide down his throat quickly enough.

"I'll go to one, see how it goes. Maybe I can even give the kids a few pointers."

He was a natural at magic anyway! How hard could learning a few new tricks be?

"What sort of magic is Ka? Not... hat tricks and disappearing coins?"

"No, no. Ka is just the house, though our focus is Sundering. That's the magic that brought us here to this place. It's... sort of a spatial and temporal displacement, I guess you might say." He wrinkled his nose, amused and a touch too pleased with himself. "A summoning. I mean, I could disappear a coin, I suppose. But if I recall correctly we were usually tasked with relocating ourselves across a room."

His eyes lit up as a pie slice was set in front of him by a quickly, almost magically disappearing waiter.

"It used to be a taboo magic to learn and teach. I think they were afraid students might summon wicked beings to do their bidding, or some such."

Oh that was rich! He couldn't help it, you know, the smirk naturally drew itself across his face until Aziraphale was sitting across from a very smug demon indeed!

"So they have an angel using forbidden magic?"

He was loving that!

"What sort of wicked beings are you going to summon to do your bidding?"

He let himself drink in the demon in all his familiar, smug charm, beautiful as anything. How did you tell your best friend of six millennia that the only being, wicked or otherwise, who you'd ever bother to summon would be him? Would always be him. And that you'd already tried it once in the past?

And then there was the other issue, the fact that Crowley was fresh off of what could best be described as their friendship breakup, while Aziraphale remembered... well... A great deal more than he should probably be thinking about.

He speared a piece of apple from his pie and caught his own reflection in Crowley's sunglasses. He tried to school his expression down to some kind of innocence.

"I've never needed forbidden magic for that. Have I?"

How perfectly scandalized Crowley would have been if he had been let in on those particular remembrances! His ever so innocently demonic thoughts were in stark contrast to those wickedly angelic ones which were hinted at only with a bite of apple, a coy expression, and a touch of verbal jousting. He was simply happy that they could sit here together and banter like old times, that all that angel and demon business was, for a while, forgotten in this quiet tender moment.

"Usually a call will do it."

He was only ever a ring away.

"But are you saying you've never been tempted? You could... I don't know, summon an imp to help you reorganize the library or scare people away from your flat when you are reading?"

Usually a call will do it. Except for a short while, a call couldn't do it, so Aziraphale had gone to lengths to attempt to bring him here. But that was all in the past, and he had shown up back then, and he had shown up now, and Aziraphale was pleased to have him a ring or a few halls away.

He wrinkled his nose to the suggestions. "They'd do more harm than good. And, yes, I know, they're demons, they don't do good, but I don't trust many with the safekeeping of books or my things. I'd hardly trust an imp. They seem rather prone to mischief."

"Of course they are prone to mischief, the word impish comes from some where."

Saying that he could see why Aziraphale wouldn't want to have any of those devilish things running about thumbing through his books or using them for stepladders but if you weren't going to be summoning helper imps what would you actually be summoning? This warranted a question!

"What do you summon in that class?"

"Yes, well..."

Who would allow imps near anything? He had to imagine they were havoc down in Hell as well. Scratch that permanently off his list of things he might ever, in a moment of sheer desperation, try to summon.

"Nothing heinous, I assure you. Mostly it's sort of a teleportation of test-subjects, I suppose you could call them. I've summoned a rabbit from one point of the room to another, that kind of thing. Oh! I bet I could do the Harry the Rabbit trick for real this time."

"Not hat tricks! Eeeeh, anything but hat tricks!"

And that was it! As far as Crowley was concerned his interest in sundering ended with Harry the Rabbit.

"Figures we get picked up, thrown across the galaxy, and end up in a school that teaches rabbit tricks!"

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Test Drive Reloaded! #1

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